Archive of Davey Mac Reports!

Hello, friends and neighbors!  This is the archive for some past phenomenal Davey Mac Reports!    Thanks, homies!

 

Andy Roddick IN! Caroline Wozniacki OUT! IN! OUT! IN OUT! This headline is making my privates all tingly! (8/29/12)

 

It’s your August Twenty-Ninth Davey Mac Sports Report and Andy Roddick has won his first-round match-up in the U.S. Open.  Meanwhile in the women’s division, eighth-seeded Caroline Wozniacki, scene in the titillating photo above, lost.  Wozniacki, pictured in the sensual picture above, has been playing with an injured knee and Wozniacki, seen in the dick-spanking pic above, was battling a struggling serve and boy, what we here at the Davey Mac Sports Headquarters would do to that broad.  We don’t care that she’s from Denmark, which we regard as America’s Number ONE Enemy.  Nor do we mind that she’s dating that Frodo Baggins-look-alike Rory McIlroy, we’d show her a REAL good time.  We’d take out the dick and say to her, “Let’s see if you can hit THAT serve, baby”…which we know doesn’t make much sense…oh, who are we kidding…we’d pussy out…we’d just look at the floor and never say anything to her…we suck…

 

Former Penn State faculty members criticized the NCAA and former FBI director Louis Freeh for “unfairly” treating the university after former Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky was found guilty of kid rape.  I think what these faculty members are failing to realize was that one of their coaches was fucking found guilty of kid rape.  And then the head football coach covered up that one of his assistants had been committing kid rape.  And maybe they should also consider, oh fuck it, KIDS WERE GETTING RAPED IN YOUR SCHOOL YOU FUCKING NITWITS!!!  SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!

 

In a radio interview Yankees General Manager Brian Cashman said that he was not surprised that former Yankees Melky Cabrera and Bartolo Colon were suspended from baseball after failing drug tests.  Cashman further commented that he also was not surprised when people try to give him a piece of cheese because they confuse him for being a giant mouse.

 

The Davey Mac Player of the Day goes to the guy who invented toilet paper because this journalist has had THE SHITS today, boy!!!  EEeeeeeehhhh-yaaaahh!!!!

See you homies this evening for the Davey Mac Sports Program at 7 Eastern, 4 Pacific on Ustream and/or RiotCast.com!!!  Adios!!

-Dave (8/29/12)