Archive of Davey Mac Reports!

Hello, friends and neighbors!  This is the archive for some past phenomenal Davey Mac Reports!    Thanks, homies!

 

Linsanity........Arrivederci!!! (7/18/12)

 

It’s your July Eighteenth Davey Mac Sports Report and an era has ended.  Like My So-Called Life, The Brady Bunch Variety Hour, and Al Roker’s Fart Time before it, LINSANITY in New York is the latest prime-time show to be cancelled after a short but sensational run.  The Knicks have decided not to match the Rockets’ offer to Jeremy Lin, and thus, he is off to Houston.  Well, it was fun while it lasted (all three fucking weeks of it).  Or is it possible that the Knicks have made the right choice?  And that Jeremy Lin is just a one-hit wonder, like Flock Of Seagulls…or Van Halen…or Gandhi…who knows?  I certainly don’t have a crystal ball…I pawned it two days ago for an old television set so that I could watch a Pawn Stars episode about a red-haired guy pawning his crystal ball for a shitty TV.  Ummagumma!!!!!!!

 

When NBA Commissioner David Stern said that future Olympic basketball teams should only consist of professionals 23-and-under, Kobe Bryant replied, saying that Stern’s proposal is “a stupid idea.”  Slam!!  I like when people call David Stern, or any sports commissioner for that matter, “stupid.”  It’s like when John Bender mouths off to Principal Gleason.  Yeah!!  Take that, jerk!!!  Speaking of which, am I the only person who found Bender’s imaginary dialogue/fantasy fight where he pretends to stand up to his dad, and plays both roles, kind of annoying?  Don’t get me wrong, I was impressed that Bender was a good enough thespian to act the part of his father as well as himself, but it was a little Tyler Durden-ish.  If I was one of the the kids in that Breakfast Club, I would have punched Bender in the face and stolen his pot for being such an over-dramatic cry-baby.  Neo-maxi-zoom-dweebie, Bender!!!!!

 

Marshawn “Beast Mode” Lynch of the Seahawks is the latest athlete who has been arrested on suspicion of DUI.  I don’t understand these guys.  They make multi-millions of dollars.  Take a cab!!  Shit, with their money, they could probably buy the fucking cab company!!!  I never drive drunk.  Now, I’m not gonna say that I haven’t eaten some peyote and piloted a blimp from time to time.  OK, fine, I do it every Sunday.  But I have to train if I’m gonna compete in the Highin’ Hindenburg Championships!!!!

 

The Davey Mac Player of the Day goes to former popular Red Sox third basemen Kevin Youkilis (who is now on the White Sox), for hitting a three-run home run in his return to Fenway (Chicago won, 7 to 5).  Youkilis, who was possibly traded for having tension with new Boston manager Bobby Valentine, had this for a comment: “Hey Bobby V, how does it feel to have a 32-ounce bat shoved up your ass?!?!  Huh, Bobby?!?!  How does it feel?!?!  And if you say ‘Good’, then I know a radio show who would love to see how many inches you can take, LIVE on the air!!!  See ya later, fuck-face!!!”

Reminder- the Davey Mac Sports Program will be LIVE on THURSDAY at 7 PM Eastern, 4 Pacific on RiotCast.com and Ustream!!  Subscribe for free to the show on iTunes!!!  See ya tomorrow for another Sports Report and for the show!!

-Dave (7/18/12)