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Oh yeah, daddy!! For those of you with the Sirius XM Satellite Radio app on your phones...or if you have online accounts...make sure that you have updated them because the new version has a great On Demand section which includes the Davey Mac Sports Program XL!!! Just search by show or by channel (The Opie & Anthony Channel), and you'll see the last three weeks of the Davey Mac show!! Enjoy the fuck out of it, baby!!! I'd stay and chat longer but I gotta go and poo!! Peace!!
It's Steve Martin's birthday! What's your favorite Steve Martin movie?
a.) The Jerk (20%)
b.) Dirty Rotten Scoundrels (14%)
c.) My Blue Heaven (14%)
d.) Farting On Elvis (12%)
e.) Hey, Stop Looking At Me Or I'll Kill You, You Fucking Piece Of Shit (a Steve Martin documentary) (13%)
f.) Carrot Top Can Go To Hell And Suck Hitler's Dick While He's There (another documentary) (13%)
g.) Albert Brooks Is About As Funny As One Of My Shits (yet another documentary) (14%)
The Olympics are now over. What was your favorite part?
a.) I liked seeing Usain Bolt winning three gold medals. (24%)
b.) My favorite part was the Russian Butt Team being upset by the Norwegian Pussy Pals. (26%)
c.) I enjoyed watching Bruce Jenner's scary-as-shit Joker face melt on live television while he worked for the E! channel. (25%)
d.) I didn't watch the Olympics. Instead, I put red jellyfish on my dick and hit it with a hammer. (25%)
Yeeeehhaaaw! Davey Mac and Pepper Stans are gonna crush the shit out of which is named Sirius XM Satellite Radio on Saturday!! The Davey Mac Sports Program XL is gonna shit the crush out of it LIVE on The Opie & Anthony Channel (Sirius 206, XM 105) at 7 PM Eastern, 4 Pacific!! We are gonna crush the shit-crush out of the crush-shit with radio shit-shit!!! Call in at 866-WOW-1-WOW!! Topics for the show shall include:
* World Famous Tooth-Brushing Champion Bucky Tethers discusses his controversial jizz gargle technique
* The Olympics- why drowning midgets in the pool should NOT be an Olympic event
* Teaching babies how to shoot cross-bows...it's fun and easy!
* America's Favorite Farmer, Ed Stuckvill, chats up his new agriculture manual, "My Neighbor Frank Gibbons Sucks Big, Fat, Elephant Dicks And I'm Gonna Shoot His Cow"
* America's Second Favorite Farmer, Frank Gibbons, talks about his new book, "If Ed Stuckvill Puts One God-Damn Foot On My Property, I'm Gonna Rape His Wife Again"
* Darts expert Jack Smarty chats about his documentary- Hi, I'm Jack Smarty...And I'm Missing Two Eyes Because I Really Suck At Darts
See you guys Saturday on Sirius XM Satellite Radio for the Davey Mac Sports Program XL!!!! LIVE on the Opie & Anthony Channel (Sirius 206, XM 105) at 7 PM Eastern, 4 Pacific!!! Peace!!!
It's been a long week with work, illness, and other shit!!! I am fucking PSYCHED that it's Friday!! What should I do?
a.) I should go to the Booze Cruise with the Pietasters TONIGHT in New York City at 7 PM! (26%)
b.) I should take my temperature anally with a Twizzler and then offer said Twizzler to my boss as "nice gesture." He'll fall for it!!! Oh yes he will!!! Hahahahahaha!!!! (24%)
c.) Maybe I should staple of pair of home-made wings to my dog and claim that I've discovered "Chim-Chim, the one-and-only Pomeranian-Duck." (25%)
d.) Whatever I do...I should NOT accidentally shit on my uncle's grave again when I'm drunk at the cemetery! (25%)
Wooooo-hoooooo!!!!! The Davey Mac Sports Program is now up on iTunes and RiotCast.com!!! On this week's episode- Olympic Mania, Andy Reid's son, Lightsabers, Roy Shaffer GETS SUSPENDED, Sean O hurts an elderly woman, Pepper has a bad case of "the butt-wind", Davey Mac rules the world, and more!!! Listen to the show NOW!! Go to iTunes and RiotCast.com for the free download!!! Peace!!!
What's your favorite Doors song?
a.) "Light My Fire" (19%)
b.) "The Lizard Cum" (20%)
c.) "Hello, I Jizz You" (20%)
d.) "When The Farting's Over" (21%)
e.) "Riders On The Dick" (20%)
I can't wait until Fall is here...I'm really starting to get sick of this God-Damned heat!!!
a.) David, that's because your half-red-head, half-martian, you pasty-skinned freak!!! Go get a tan and stick a carrot up your ass!!! (24%)
b.) I don't like this time of year either, Dave, ever since the August of 1987 when I discovered that my father liked to jerk off horses in warm weather. (25%)
c.) It's all the same to me, Davey Mac! Summer, Fall, icicles, cheese, cardboard, maggots, teeth...it's all the same to me- Harvey, The Man Who Can't Tell Anything Apart...coming soon from Marvel Movies. (26%)
d.) I disagree, Dave Man. I love the Summer. I barbecue hot dogs, and hamburgers, and little Swedish babies...it's great! (25%)
Oh, baby!!! The Davey Mac Sports Program is LIVE this evening on the marvelous Internet!!! WATCH and listen to the show on RiotCast.com and/or Ustream at 7 Eastern, 4 Pacific!!!
It's "East Side" Dave McDonald- The Master of Sports...The Maker of Dreams...The Lighter of Farts!
Chris "Pepper" Stanley- The Lord of Beasts...and Mayor of Hamburgers!
Roy Shaffer- The Keeper of the Flame...Assassin of Keyboards!
Sean O- The King of Beer...The Sound Extraordinaire!
It's LOVE, DICKS, FRIENDS, POETRY, TICKLES, PICKLES, and good old-fashioned FUN with CUM!!!
Join us this evening on RiotCast.com and/or Ustream at 7 Eastern, 4 Pacific!!!
Can we be petting pals?
a.) This is it, David. I'm calling the police. (25%)
b.) I don't want to be petting pals, Dave Man...but I wouldn't mind being Toes Twins. Lick 'N' Pick! (24%)
c.) What exactly does being "petting pals" mean? If it entails stacking our dicks on top of each other as if they were playing cards...then I'm in!!!! (26%)
d.) I'll be petting pals with you, Davey. As soon as I'm done touching my mom inappropriately! Yowza! (25%)
Hey homies who listen to Michele & Dave on 90.5 The Night, today begins our week long membership drive! The Night is a public radio rock station, and most of our support comes from listeners like YOU! So if you can, please become a member today and receive some cool items! Go to 90.5TheNight.org or call 732-224-2492 and tell 'em Dave sent you!!! Thanks!!!!!!!
I got a hair cut yesterday and am feeling good.
a.) Good! Now change you shit-pants, you dirty son of a bitch!! (24%)
b.) Hair cuts are good but not as good as sucking your own dick!! Yeeeaahh! (25%)
c.) I hate getting my hair cut almost as much as I hate getting fucked by a goat...which happens every Tuesday...don't ask... (25%)
d.) Nice job, David! Now go get your fucking shine box!!! (26%)
Thaaaaaaaaaat's right, film fans!! A brand new show, The Watchers, starring "East Side" Dave McDonald, Chris "Pepper" Stanley, Roy Shaffer & Sean O is here!!! Concentrating on the world of cinema (mixed with a little TV) The Watchers are your movie experts full of liquor, marijuana, cough syrup, Lifesavers, Doritos, and fun!!! Listen to this new monthly special from fucked-up film fans that YOU can trust!! Click on this TheWatchers.Libsyn.com/Webpage or subscribe on The Watchers' iTunes link!!! Enjoy!!!
Shiiiiiiiiiit yeah!!!!! The Davey Mac Sports Program XL will scoop this shit and propel it LIVE on Sirius XM Satellite Radio on Saturday at 7 PM Eastern, 4 Pacific!!! It's gonna be more fun than a bag full of soft dicks!! Call in at 866-WOW-1-WOW!! Topics shall include:
* Pet Expert Billy Frinkins discusses his new memoir, I Murdered My Hamster With A Ruler
* Candy savant Nikolai Berry chats up his new TV show for the Food Network, "Tootsie Rolls Look Like Little Shits"
* Chalk- it sort of looks like hard cum
* Soft things- why they make us feel like pussies when we're holding them
* Talk show host Dick McGupple asks the question, "...And just who made the Mexicans anyway? You? Me? Who fucking knows???"
* And newsman Charles Burke reads from his favorite book, Stuff Is Dripping Out Of My Ass And Onto The Floor And My Dog Is Now Licking It Up
See you homies on Saturday on Sirius XM Satellite Radio!!!
I'm going to get a nice beard trim and possibly a haircut today, even though I haven't showered in quite some time and the Supercuts that I go to only has chicks working there. Discuss.
a.) That's not what you should be worried about, David. The fact that you somehow have some dried semen stuck to your hair is what you should be fucking worried about!!! (25%)
b.) I would be quite embarrassed at your smell, Dave Man. It's an aroma of old Chapstick, horse piss, bloody Play-Doh, and farts from a Wookie. Not good, Dave Man...not good. (25%)
c.) Ah, fuck it, Davey Mac. I hate taking showers, too!! Just like you!! We also have in common the fact that we both stalk Matt Lauer!!! Shit, gotta go, Matt's on the move!!!! (24%)
d.) I don't want to discuss this. I'm too emotional after seeing this beautiful film recently...Major League 3: Back To The Minors. (26%)
Who is the least funny comedian of the following people:
a.) Steve Harvey (19%)
b.) Ellen DeGeneres (18%)
c.) "Farty" Marty Tolliver (21%)
d.) Brandon Pee-Pee (22%)
e.) He-Man Williams (20%)
Shit yeah!!! A fuck-tastic new Davey Mac Sports Program (the Internet version) is up and available on RiotCast.com and/or iTunes!!!! Subscribe FOR FREE and enjoy the holy jizz out of it!!!
This week: Olympic Mania!! Roy Shaffer gets fired!! Pepper gets the shaft!! Sean O gets drunk!! And Davey Mac gets even more Masterful in the World of Sports!! Plus, poor Jerry Sandusky is feeling blue!!
Listen to the "Best show of all-fucking-time!!! Someone suck my cock!!!" - Fred Willard
Go to RiotCast.com and/or iTunes for the Davey Mac Sports Program!! Peace!!
Heck yeah! Fuck yeah! Yeah yeah! WATCH the Davey Mac Sports Program rock the shit LIVE on RiotCast.com and/or Ustream this evening at 7 Eastern, 4 Pacific!!! Join David, Pepper, Sean O, and Roy Shaffer for a piss party that gonna's rival any of the great piss festivals such as Pisscock or Lollajizzpissa!!! We're gonna let off more steam than all six of the Fart Brothers combined!!! And an hour or so following the video broadcast, the show is available for a free download on iTunes and RiotCast.com!! Subscribe to the show and enjoy the holy fuck out of it the way a small animal likes to burrow in the dirt like a little idiot!!! For all the links- click on those damned under-lined words or go to the Davey Mac Sports Page!! See ya later!!! Owwwww!!!!!!
It's August First. We only have one more month of Summer.
a.) That really bums me out. I love Summertime and with it all the Ecstasy that I sell to rock festival asshole-kids. And they never suspect that indeed what I've sold them and which they ingest is not Ecstasy but actually rat poison!! Enjoy the Skrillex show, cock-suckers!!!! (25%)
b.) I don't like Summer actually. I get too hot and sweaty. Like...my ass, for instance. It sweats all over the couch. And then there is just brown, chunky, sweat on my furniture. Brown, chunky, stinky, rough sweat. Come to think of it, maybe I don't sweat after all. Maybe I have a shitting-myself-issue. Damn. (24%)
c.) I like Summer Sanders, former Olympian. I'd like to take her on a date to a museum and, when we're looking at artwork, give her a hand-drawn picture of my sickly dick that I made for her. (25%)
d.) I like all the seasons--- Summer, Winter, Autumn, Tug-Time, Pee-Pee, Flick-Fuck--- they're ALL good! (26%)
How are you liking the Olympics so far?
a.) I'm loving them almost as much as I love letting a puppy bite me on the dick...which is A LOT!!! (25%)
b.) I didn't even know the Olympics had begun!! I've been watching a marathon of The Real House-Whores & Slut-bags of Little Rock on the Cum-ball channel!! (26%)
c.) I'm watching equestrian right now. I was thinking that it would be cooler if the horse's head suddenly blew up as he was going for a jump. Hahahaha!!! Gotta go back to my murder trial now...see ya! (25%)
d.) I've enjoyed the swimming races. Except, I didn't like that part where Billy Zane was in the pool and started shooting at people. I thought that was wrong...you know what? I'm sorry, I've been watching Titanic, not the Olympics. Sorry. Harmless mistake. (24%)
