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Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 30)

  What are you gonna do on New Year's Eve?

a.) Have a nice, quiet night at home with my family. (12%)

b.) Go to a massive party and shit my brains out. (8%)

c.) Puke on the sidewalk in front of horrified children who will be traumatized forever. (22%)

d.) Stalk an ex-lover. (18%)

e.) Plan an escape from my prison cell and pay a little "visit" to the mother-fuckers who set me up!!!  They're gonna fucking pay!!!!! (40%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

...A couple of things from David McDonald...

  ...first of all, I love you.  No shit.  I ain't afraid to say it.  I love you and would like to squeeze you into a million pieces and then take those pieces and put them in my pocket and go on a roller-coaster with those pieces.

Secondly, the Davey Mac Sports Program, both the highly-acclaimed Internet version and the even more highly-acclaimed Sirius XM Satellite Radio version have been on vacation (mainly because no one else would do the show with me during Christmas week), but that doesn't mean that you can't enjoy the wonder and magic that was the Davey Mac Sports Program XL Holiday Special!  It shall replay this Saturday on the Opie & Anthony Channel- Sirius 206, XM 105- at 8 PM (EST)!  A truly remarkable program can be drunkenly enjoyed again so tune in!

Thirdly, after going on the roller-coaster with you, I'd take you into my office and scatter you on a bulletin board like I was John Nash, trying to solve problems and shit.

Sayonara!

 

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 29)

  Should I be nervous that I pooped up four, totally undigested grapes this morning?

a.) No, it's natural. (28%)

b.) Yes, you are probably some sort of fruit-demon and belong in Hades. (33%)

c.) You should be more nervous that after you pooped up your precious grapes, you touched them a little while they were still in the toilet bowl.  This signals mental problems, you fucking freak!!! (39%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

 

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 28)

  How do you feel about New Year's Eve?

a.) It is an over-rated holiday. (18%)

b.) Bull shit!  It is an under-rated holiday!  (22%)

c.) I'm usually blacked out on New Year's Eve so how the hell would I know?!  (21%)

  d.) I make my biggest mistakes of the year on that day!  I love it! (19%)

e.) My dick hurts! (20%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

More great photos from Evan of HeyNiceCamera.blogspot.com from East Side Dave Birthday Party!

  (Thanks to Evan for more great shots from the 11/11/11 East Side Dave Number One Birthday Party!  Visit Evan’s site on http://HeyNiceCamera.blogspot.com/ and follow him on Twitter.com/HeyNiceCamera!

 

Dave blows the roof off the house

 

The East Side Dave Number One Birthday Party Evidence Pictures

 

And in case you missed some:

Dave and Anthony Cumia (from the Opie & Anthony Show)- the new Simon and Garfunkel

 

Dave and Primetime Sam Roberts (of Sirius XM)

 

Dave and Sam- Don't Look Back In Anger (with marijuana in coat pocket)

 

Dave- birthday parties are fun!

Spend New Year's Eve this Saturday with a replay of the Davey Mac Sports Program XL Holiday Special on Sirius XM!

  First of all, I want to say Happy Holidays and I hope you're enjoying yourselves and that you've had a great Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and what have you!  If you are a white Atheist, then I hope a safe or piano doesn't fall on your head while you are walking on the sidewalk, I guess, I don't fucking know!!!  Anyway, we had a great show over the weekend!  If you missed it, fear not!  A replay of the Davey Mac Sports Program XL Holiday Special will be on this Saturday on Sirius XM Satellite Radio!  Just tune to the Opie & Anthony Channel- Sirius 206, XM 105- at 8 PM (EST) for the joy and wonder and probably a little pukies!!  Too much punch!  OK, ok, too much Jack Daniels that I put in the punch, fine you caught me!!  See ya then!!!!

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 27)

  What is the most depressing part of the Post-Christmas season?

a.) Taking down the decorations (6%)

b.) No more anticipation for presents (3%)

c.) No Christmas specials on TV (7%)

d.) Whoa, whoa, whoa!  We still have New Year's Eve to look forward to!!  And we shall celebrate by over-drinking and farting!!  Then we have Valentine's Day where we will take the missus out to a fine restaurant where we shall over-drink and fart!  Then, St. Patty's Day!!  That goes without fucking saying!!  Next up is Easter where we will honor Jesus' resurrection by a little over-drinking and farting...July Fourth, grilling and over-drinking...Labor Day- drink, fart...Halloween- drink, candy, fart...Thanksgiving- eat, poop, drink, football, nap, drink, fart...and then it's Christmas all over again!!!  Now cheer up, silly!!!!!  (84%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

 

 

The Davey Mac Sports Program XL on Sirius XM Satellite Radio, Saturday, Christmas Eve!

  Yessiree, daddy!  Spend Christmas Eve with the Davey Mac Sports Program XL on Sirius XM Satellite Radio!  Tune in at 8 PM (EST) to the Opie & Anthony Channel- Sirius 206, XM 105- for the Christmas magic!  We shall sing Christmas carols, drink too much alcohol, poop a little, talk the sports, exchange gifts, order hookers, avoid bullet-fire, resist being blackmailed, and have a generally Merry Ol’ Time!!  Be there!!  And if you miss it; the show replays on Monday at 3 AM (EST)!  See you there!!  Oh look, boys and girls!!  I think I see reindeer!!    Wait, nope, I’m just on acid again!!  Shit, Rudolph is shooting lasers at us with his nose!!  Duck everybody!!!

 

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from East Side Dave McDonald!

  Hi, homies!  I just wanted to say Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everybody!!  I hope you get everything you want as long as it's not some over-sized dildo (Aunt Eudice), a package of crystal meth (Cousin Frankie), or another sex slave from "parts unknown" (Uncle Gary).  Have a wonderdul holiday season and listen to the Davey Mac Sports Program XL, on Sirius XM Satellite Radio, this Saturday (Christmas Eve) at 8 PM (EST) on the Opie & Anthony Channel- Sirius 206, XM 105!!  Now if you'll excuse me, I have to drive Uncle Gary to the airport!  Merry Christmas!!!  Let's do's it!!!!

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 23)

  Christmas is almost here!  Have you been naughty or nice?

a.) Naughty (14%)

b.) Nice (24%)

c.) Which list would "killing a guy" put me on? (18%)

d.) Is it naughty to rape an animal? (21%)

e.) I've been nice...but only to criminals (23%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 22)

  Christmas is only three days away.  Be honest.  Do you prefer giving or receiving?

a.) Receiving (12%)

b.) Giving (37%)

c.) I don't prefer one over the other.  I'm just praying to Jesus that I don't get arrested on Christmas Eve yet again and am forced to spend the whole next day in the God-Damned slammer!  How was I supposed to know that you can't operate a pogo stick while intoxicated?  When did that fucking law get passed?!?!  'Cause I sure as shit wouldn't have voted for it!!!! (51%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 20)

  How excited are you for Christmas?

a.) So excited I haven't farted in 10 days! (22%)

b.) So excited that I've farted 50 times in the past four minutes! (28%)

c.) All this farting talk is making me nauseous! (26%)

d.) I just farted! (24%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

Davey Mac Sports Program XL on Sirius XM Satellite Radio- legitimized by the Internet!

  Hey, homies!  We were pleasantly surprised to learn that the Official Sirius XM Satellite Radio site has the Davey Mac Sports Program XL listed as one of the Shows on the Opie & Anthony Channel (Sirius 206, XM 105)!  Also, listed in the Hosts section, is Mr. David McDonald!  Yeeehhhaaww!!  Not it's only a matter of time before our show goes daily!  And then maybe they re-name Sirius XM Satellite Radio:  Davey-us DM Dynamite Fabio!!  But we want to make it absolutely clear that we mean "Fabio" in the Italian "Fabulous" sense of the word; and that in NO WAY is Dave McDonald linked to that big, fucking, modelling weirdo!!  Though sometimes we do think we would like Fabio's hair, and maybe we wouldn't mind touching his biceps a little and-  FUCK!  Listen to us!!  We're getting side-tracked!!!  Check out the great, new show in radio, the Davey mac Sports Program XL, on Sirius XM, every Saturday at 8 PM (EST) on the Opie & Anthony Channel, Sirius 206, XM 105!!  And check out the link!!  Peace!!!

http://www.siriusxm.com/theopie&anthonychannel

 

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 19)

  I heard one of my neighbors say he "hates Christmas."  What should I do?

a.) Ignore it (12%)

b.) Gift-wrap my and my dog's feces, light the "presents" on fire, then throw it down his chimney with a note that says May You Burn In Hell.  Love, Santa Fucking Claus. (88%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

 

Davey Mac Sports Program XL is LIVE on Saturday the 17th on Sirius XM Satellite Radio!

  Oh yes, baby!!!  The Davey Mac Sports Program XL is LIVE on Sirius XM Satellite Radio, Saturday the 17th!!  Tune in to the Opie & Anthony Channel (Sirius 206, XM 105) at 8 PM (EST)!!!  Call in at 866-WOW-1-WOW!!  Email at Didvod@gmail.com!!  Touch your toes!!  Stick your tongue out!!  Now cough!!!  Yup!!  You have a little throat infection!!  Nothing major, thank God!!!  Now here's what I want you to do!!!  Get some throat lozenges and make yourself a nice, warm cup of tea with a little bit of lemon and a dash of honey!!!  Then, just take it easy for a bit!!  Put your feet up!!!  Relax!!!  You fucking deserve it!!!

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 16)

  If you had to have a different eye arrangement on your face, which would you most be comfortable with?

a.) One, giant Cyclops eye (34%)

b.) Five eyes in a row on your fore-head (9%)

c.) Two regular eyes...but located where your nipples are...and just skin on your face where your eyes would be (6%)

d.) Are you on acid again, David? (52%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 15)

  NOW are you excited for Christmas?

a.) Yes, I'm started to get the Christmas Spirit (20%)

b.) Fuck YOU, Davey Mac! (16%)

c.) I'm so fucking hammered right now! (17%)

d.) Does anyone have some ether? (18%)

e.) I could use some coke! (17%)

f.) Hey, I'm Jewish, DICK!! (12%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)

Davey Mac Sports Program LIVE tonight on Ustream at 7 PM EST!

  That's right, my homies and home-ettes!!  The Davey Mac Sports Program, the most heralded show in Internet History, is LIVE tonight on Ustream at 7 PM EST!  Just go to the Ustream section on this site to watch!  And if you miss it, fear not!!  The show will be available on iTunes or Stitcher.com (whichever works best for you) a couple of hours after the broadcast!  We're gonna have so much fun that three to five homeless people will have their lives turned around and they will find steady-paying jobs and get houses!  Then they will move up in their respective professions and, after seven and a half years, become the CEO's of their corporations!  Two years after that, they will become involved in a corporate Ponzi scheme, wherein they will lose all their money and go back to living on the streets!!  Fuck!!  Not exactly the happy ending I was looking for!!  Well, anyway, see ya tonight!  And don't forget, the Davey Mac Sports Program XL is LIVE this Saturday on the Opie & Anthony Channel (Sirius 206, XM 105) at 8 PM EST!  But that's another story about greedy fucking homeless people for another day!!  Peace!!

-Dave

 

Poll-verizing! (Dave Poll of the Day- Dec. 13)

  What Christmas movie do you cry the most at?

 

a.) A Christmas Story (18%)

 

b.) It's A Wonderful Life (41%)

 

c.) Jingle All The Way (2%)

 

d.) Uncle Frankie's Very Jizzy Christmas! (39%)

 

Vote NOW in the All About ESD-Contact Info section of this site! (Voting results in parentheses)