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Did you know?

The funeral business as we know it was essentially created in the American Civil War!  It's true.  People used to get carried to the funeral home and buried instantly.  But morticians discovered formaldehyde and it was on like Donkey Kong, bitches.  In fact, this was the only reason that Abraham Lincoln's body went on a tour of the U.S.  like he was Elvis' fucking golden Cadillac. Look it up, Tony!