I have horrible allergies. Help me.
a.) Sure, Davey Mac! I'll help you...by fucking your ass with my over-sized, blue-ribbon, county fair-winning zucchini, you sick son of a bitch!! (26%)
b.) I don't help anyone with anything, David. And that includes my pet duck, Puffy, when he started quacking in horror for help as I was eating his brain. (23%)
c.) I'm in jail, Dave Man. No can do!!! (24%)
d.) I'll help you, Diddy...by cutting off your fucking nose and feeding it to my grandpa!! Hahahaha!! ...I'm also in jail... (27%)