Do you go out shopping/"sales-hunting" on Black Friday?
a.) Fuck NO, Dave Man!! The only things I go huntin' for are illegals, dag-nabbit!! Hold on a second!! I think I see two Canadian rascals tryin' to cross our God-Damn border as we speak!! Where's my rifle?! Bang-bang!! (24%)
b.) I don't really enjoy going outside, David. I prefer staying indoors, taking some nails, and hammering my penis into a wooden board. (26%)
c.) I LOVE Black Friday, Davey Mac!! I get all minstreled-up a la Ted Danson at Whoopi Goldberg's roast and fucking take some matches and---oh. Your Black Friday and MY Black Friday are probably two separate days...nevermind. (24%)
d.) Sometimes when I shop I enjoy farting on the cash register. (26%)