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Hey Chicago Cubs, just what the fuck do you think you're doing?

The Chicago Cubs, an original Major League Baseball club of excellent tradition and old school values, an organizaiton that has been in existence since 1876 for shit's sake, has just announced that for the first time in team history they will have a mascot........called Clark the fucking Cub.  Pictured next to the text is the official release of what Clark will look like....and needless to say.....he sucks elephant dicks.  Clark looks like a rejected cast member of The Chipmunks circa 1984.  Quite frankly, Clark is an asshole.  Ernie Banks.  Andre Dawson.  Clark the Cub.  Jesus, my private area just inverted itself because of how douched out it got by looking at his dopey fucking face.  Hey Clark, suck mah dick!!

    Clark- what's he hiding and is it in his hibernation cave?