I got a haircut and I am feeling good.
a.) Good. Now change your shit-pants, you dirty son of a bitch!!!
b.) Hair-cuts are nice. Not as nice as sucking your own dick...but nice nonetheless.
c.) I hate getting my hair cut almost as much as I hate getting fucked by a goat...which happens every Tuesday...don't ask...
d.) Good for you, David! Why don't you go jump in a volcano and lava yourself to death, you bragging bastard!!!